Dec 29, 2011

Turkey boycotts the French kiss, French fries and French words

Turkey accepted the French legislative resolution on penalizing the denial of Armenia Genocide with a furry. It has warned of serious political, economic and cultural consequences.

Turkish response includes recalling its ambassador from France, putting mutual economic projects on hold, hacking leading french websites, as well as websites of legislators linked to the legislation.

Among the long-term effect sanctions prime minister Erdogan put forward are boycotting anything that has "french" in it, including the following:

a) French kiss will be banned in the territory of Turkey. Those caught using the french "technique" of kissing will be fined in a sum equivalent to the penalty imposed by France for denying the Armenian Genocide. Moreover, the french kiss scenes will be censored from movies and episodes on Turkish TV channels.

b) The french fries will be banned from food outlets in the territory of Turkey, for they insult turkishness according to the penal code 301 (even though they originate from Belgium).

c) (Swiss) cheese dish Fondue largely popular in France is also banned in the territory of Turkey, as it is mistaken to be French.

d) Turkey will recover the original Turkish boycott of French words and will strictly enforce it henceforth, referring to a publication in The Times (1914) "... the French words hitherto in use in the Turkish language will be replaced by German words. Henceforth Turks will say Herr, Frau, Fraulein, Freiherr, Ritter, Furst, ...and other German words the need of which may be felt." (this last part is not a joke, they banned French words in 1914:-))

PM Erdogan warned that if the legislation is confirmed in the Senate, Turkey will remember atrocities committed by the French during colonial rule and will adopt a similar law criminalizing denial of French Genocide towards the aboriginal tribes in South Pole, North Pole, Moon and Planet Mars.

Among other proposals is to ban the entry of those tourists to Turkey who have previously visited French Guinea, French Polynesia and French Southern and Antarctic Lands, as well as to use state funding and support art nouveau that includes expressions that insult France, with a precondition that the end products are referred to as modern art, rather than art nouveau, and they express a "considerable" amount of hate towards France.